When people first come to us, they are usually desperate for change. A recent autism diagnosis sends conscientious parents looking for anything that will help their family regain some sense of normalcy. This quest for answers and the normal desire to fix things can escalate to a frenzied pace and a flurry of activity that increases everyone’s anxiety. Too often, this leads to a ‘crisis’ mindset that can be the first obstacle many parents have to conquer.
To become an effective Mindful Guide you must be able to move out of this mental state where you are looking everywhere and anywhere for solutions, where you are living day-to-day and where you are unable to gain the perspective you vitally need to see down the road.
Effects of Being in a State of Crisis:
- We lose perspective
- We can only focus on the short term
- We become focused on immediate problems
- We spend our energies putting out fires
- Our pace becomes too rapid
- We do not dare to stop and reflect
- We are unable to learn from our experience
- We use our resources inefficiently
- We try to go everywhere and try everything
When parenting a typically developing child, we take the background elements of our relationship for granted.
- We assume that we will be able to interpret the child’s moment-to-moment reactions to make ongoing adjustments, ensuring that we can provide productive challenges
- We assume the child will be highly motivated to seek out to engage with us in a growth-promoting activities
- We do not have to worry that the child will suddenly disengage for no apparent reason, or withdraw if we introduce something new
With Relationship Development Intervention, our consultants help parents move from this difficult place and gain the tools to become an effective guide to your child.