Providing support for our autistic teen or adult is a necessary part of being a parent, and this is often one of our top concerns. But as we do so, we can unknowingly fall into a default mechanism that infantilizes the individual and treats them as if they are not capable of being their own person. We typically do this with the underlying belief that we are giving the best support, and that we have our teen or adult’s best interests in mind, however, infantilizing them is unnecessary, and innately dangerous.
In this episode of “Autism: A New Perspective,” Dr. Sheely talks about RDI® and parent empowerment. So many parents of autistic children find that they don’t know what’s going on with their child’s learning and growth – they don’t know what’s happening at the clinics or at school – and they don’t know the next step, or how they can help, and it leaves them feeling powerless.
How can RDI® provide real-world support for your child, teen, or young adult to prepare them for higher education, or a real-world job? In Dr. Steven Gutstein’s words, “Dynamic Intelligence is the mental ability that enables humans to successfully navigate the world and our relationships….and we have developed many resources to meet the mental challenges encountered in dynamic environments.”
Even though this can look different for every autistic person, autistic individuals – especially children, commonly struggle with executive functioning. Individuals with executive dysfunction can lack acquired motivation to achieve goals and prepare for normal events in day-to-day life (i.e., money management), and they often experience difficulties picking up on skills such as organization, planning, and reasoning without guided learning experiences. Despite these challenges, autistic individuals can learn to manage money.
Feeling anxious, especially when beginning autism remediation, is common among both children and their parents, but anxiety can have a positive side. It can often make us more responsive and more creative.
As loving parents, we want our children to succeed in life. But sometimes, this pushes us blindly into overcompensation. We find ourselves frequently sneaking in and organizing our autistic teen’s school work to ensure they have a positive next day in class. Or we continue to do our kid’s laundry because we do not trust that they will do it themselves and that they will end up with no clean clothes in their closet. By not letting our kid fly on their own, we teach them that they are not accountable and lack responsibility. In turn, we presume incompetence, even if it only pertains to some areas of their lives. This can lead our children to feel that independence is either impossible or that they are flawed.
Wellbeing is defined as the state of being “comfortable, healthy, and happy,” a simple definition for something that, for many people, isn’t quite so simple. Life gets in the way of our self-care and our wellbeing, and this can be especially true for parents of children who have special needs.
When an individual ages out of traditional therapy for autism it can present daunting challenges for a young adult or teen, as well as their parents. Where do I go from here as I transition to adulthood? What resources are available for housing, employment, mental health counseling, and other supports long-term?
Dynamic Intelligence refers to a collection of resources including self-knowledge, mental habits, mindsets, and mental tools that help us function effectively in complex dynamic environments. In simple terms, DI helps individuals cope with diverse situations, become problem-solvers, and learn to effectively pivot with life changes.
