Intrinsic motivation is the ability to be motivated internally, without external reward. Building intrinsic motivation in our children, autism or not, is a goal of all parents because without this force driving them, they will never achieve independence.Â
Guiding Relationship
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Building the Foundations of Mental Apprentice (and what that means!)Â
In order to benefit from the MindGuiding relationship the child (apprentice) needs to have formed certain foundations. Here are the five Foundations of a mental apprentice – and how to help lay them.
Laying the Foundation for Intrinsic Motivation through Declarative Language
Being asked questions is perceived as a demand by many children. In fact, questions or demands actually raise blood pressure in the child, putting them on the defensive! Use declarative language instead!
Emotion Sharing Activities
Activities that can help you and your autistic child build a connection with one another, share emotion and promote social engagement.
What is Executive Functioning and How Autism Affects It
Executive functioning is critical to our independence as an adult, and most of us are not aware that we possess it. It is comprised of cognitive and mental abilities that help us regulate, control, and manage our thoughts and actions and can be a marked challenge for autistic people.
Obstacle to the Guiding Relationship
Whether you are new to the RDI® Model or have been around for some time, at some point you will face challenges and obstacles in the process of Guiding your autistic child. Learn more by watching...
Mindful Communication
Recommendations for developing mindful, experience-sharing communicationChanging the approach to the way you interact with your child can make all the difference in his or her mental...
Why RDI® Emphasizes the Guiding Relationship
When infants who go on to be diagnosed with autism do not contribute sufficient energy to their relationship, parents, no matter how motivated or proficient they are, are unable to guide and their relationship cannot develop in a normal manner. The Guiding Relationship helps a child develop the tools that will carry them through their life. RDI® helps to re-establish this relationship.
Co-Regulation: An Example
Keep practicing… at home, at the shopping mall, the beachfront…. wherever we are!
Slowly Adding Challenge
Regulatory patterns form the basis of what we try to establish with the work that we do with our families. But it is not about routinely instructing or telling the child what to do where this baseline pattern is concerned. There are many elements that need to be factored in while a family attempts to establish a pattern.
The Cook’s Assistant
Nick is going through a stubborn teenager phrase. He only wants to do what he wants to do. When invited to join me in some form of interaction, he makes the sign for ‘finished’ quicker than you can say, “let’s…..”
Framing through Holiday Activities
Celebrate the Holidays RDI® style with Kat Lee.
Are You Stealing Your Child’s Thinking?
Changing our style of teaching children with autism from ‘static’ to ‘dynamic’ uses activities that require the child to ‘think’ his way to a solution.
Entertaining Your Autistic Child
It’s the ‘easiest’ way to live with your child in the short term. You take him out and do the things he likes as you try to avoid him stimming, nagging or even throwing tantrums. Life then develops a pattern, where any time parent and child have together is spent doing entertaining activities because the child is ‘happy’ and it causes less conflict. But take a minute to ask yourself: “What is my child is getting out of these experiences?”
Partnering with Your Child
For some parents, a partnership – where both parties have authentic roles in a meaningful task, activity, or project – with their child may come naturally, for others, it may feel challenging at first. I encourage you to partner with your child at least 10 times per day, everyday. It will get easier and you can start out small and always build on your successes in length of time you are partnering or ways in which you partner.
The Roles of Mom and Dad in RDI®
As an RDI® consultant in Asia, specifically Indonesia, I see a lot of dads struggling in the beginning of the program because of the cultural beliefs that influence family life and interpersonal relationship. Even though things have changed so much in the younger generation, in many traditional Asian families the father’s role is primarily to provide material support for the family, while the mother’s role is primarily to take care of the children. The father does not usually start a conversation with his children. He tends to be distant. As a result, dad has difficulties learning how to play, have casual conversation and build close relationships with his child; this becomes even more challenging when they have a child with special conditions.
Meet Your Kids Where They Are
Children have good days and bad days, just like the rest of us. Variability is a normal part of the human experience. Just because your child could do it yesterday doesn’t mean he can do it today. We all have good days and bad days. So does your child.
Laughing with RDI
Give a boy a water pistol and he knows exactly what to do with it! Not so with my Nick.
Mindfulness
I want to be present in my life. I want to actually experience it, the good and even the bad. I want to learn and not repeat mistakes. I want to actually be a part of the good things that happen, really being in it and really feeling the feels. This is a mindset known as mindfulness.
Avoid Overcompensating for Communication Issues
Often parents do most of the “work” in keeping the social exchange going.
Helping Your Child to Learn to Solve Problems
Guides recognize that learning, and from there competence, comes with doing. It comes with struggling, thinking, failing and succeeding. Guides recognize their ability to make the most of regular ole’ interactions when they focus on spotlighting problems rather than solutions.
Family Adventures
In RDI we coach parents to include their ASD child in meaningful opportunities where both parent and child collaborate not only in ‘doing’ things together.